Overcoming Inferiority by using your gift

“Cultivate your own capabilities. Rabbits don’t fly. Eagles don’t swim. Ducks look funny trying to climb. Squirrels don’t have feathers. Stop comparing. Enjoy being you! There’s plenty of room in the forest.” -Charles Swindoll

Jesus told a story of a man who had been given a single talent. If everyone else had received the same, he probably would have taken it gladly. But because it was less cash than the others around him were given, he hid his coin in a napkin, buried it, and did nothing further until he shamefacedly handed it back to the king.

When reading that story one day, I was startled to think that I might be doing the same thing this poor fellow did. It wasn’t money I was working with, but it was a gift all the same. Sitting in a mud puddle of negative feelings, I was going to have nothing to offer Christ when He came for me except the shame of having done nothing at all.

Today: Recognize that God has given you a gift. It may not be the gift you hoped for nor the one in the limelight. But thank God that He has given you a way to bless those around you. Find ways to cultivate and use your gift instead of petulantly hiding it in a napkin because you wanted the gift your friend received.

What do you enjoy doing? Chances are you have been gifted in things that spark your interest. Do you enjoy working with children? Baking? Writing? Teaching? Helping people? Find a sense of fulfillment in using your gift to bless someone else, no matter how small it feels to you.

Overcoming Inferiority with God-honoring Thoughts

Thoughts form the thermostat which regulates what we accomplish in life. If I adjust my thermostat forward –to thoughts filled with vision, hope, and victory- I can count on that kind of day.  Charles Swindoll

This week: 

Honor God with your thought life. Remember that advice in Philippians that says to think about things that are true? This means we reject daydreams where someone wrongs you or those where you are a perpetual heroine. It also means we reject negative thoughts about ourselves. Fill your mind with truthful and God-honoring thoughts.

Refuse to degrade yourself. The God who created you said you are very good. We dishonor Him by forever calling ourselves a failure. The next time someone gives you a compliment, accept it with a smile and a thank you (or a “Praise God” or whatever response comes easily to you) instead of trying to brush it off. 

Cultivate an attitude of gratitude. There is power in thanksgiving, a power in focusing on blessings that pulls our minds away from spirals of negativity. 

Throughout your day, look for little things that add happiness, beauty, or blessings to your life. Write down at least ten things today. . .and tomorrow. . .and until you get in the habit of being on the lookout for the little dewdrops of blessing God gives to you. 

I keep mine in a journal designated for this list. It makes rich reading later on, sort of becoming a journal but one filled only with positive blessings God gave. I am usually inspired when I read over it and find myself being grateful to God all over again for all His gifts to me. Sometimes I print little pictures I have taken and tape those in my journal, like my daughter using the vacuum attachments as a violin or the first tulips of spring.

More ideas to lead you toward victory over your thoughts:

• Do something else. If you are sitting in your living room and find your thoughts turning negative, get up and go somewhere else. Do something else. Diversions can be healthy.
• Do something kind for someone else. Bake bread in cute, little loaves, tie them up with a ribbon and drop them in somebody’s car at church. Volunteer to help someone for a day.
• As soon as thoughts come you want to reject, quote a Bible verse that is precious to you. Or pray for someone in need. Use these thoughts of low-worth as your prompt to pray for someone who needs Jesus or who is in a really difficult situation.
• Get some exercise, preferably in the fresh air. Exercise is an effective tool in warding off depression. 

Overcoming Inferiority -You are Loved

(Internet connection has been bad enough in our West African town that I’ve been unable to get online until today and this success is only because we found a place in town with better connection than home.)

Exercise for the week: 

Along with catching our thoughts in their infancy, focus on this: You are loved by God. If only we could wrap ourselves in this blanket, snuggle in, and never shake it off we would never ever be cast into the despair brought on by feeling insignificant. Allow this truth to penetrate through the lies of the Enemy that tells you God made a mistake in creating you, that you are insignificant in His kingdom (or anywhere else), or that you are inferior. When He made you, He did so with purpose and ended that creation by saying you were very good. Trust His judgment. Lean back against this truth, close your eyes in deep contentment, and bask in His love. 

John 17:23 –God loves us as he loves Christ. And that is a lot.

John 15:9 –As God loves Christ, so Christ loves us. This, too, is immense. So much so that He not only died for us, but also loved us enough to want us to sit with him in heavenly places. (Ephesians 2:4-6)

Psalm 139:13-16 -He designed you, then placed you carefully in your mother's womb where you were watched over and loved by Him.

Ephesians 1:6 -In Him, you are accepted with an unconditional acceptance not based on accomplishments, degrees, or recognition of friends. His death gives us worth and value. We are accepted by God. 

John 3:16, 1 John 4:9 -The greatest expression of His love was to die so we could live, not just 'somehow' but victoriously and fully. He paid very dearly for you.  You have great worth and value. 

John 15:16 -You were chosen by Him. I can't remember the name of the speaker, I remember very little else he said, but I remember him reading this verse and saying, "I likes to be chose." I agree with him. I likes to be chose, too. 

Ephesians 2:4-6 -God loved us enough to let Jesus die so we could be seated with Him in heavenly places. Our position in Christ is one of victory and power, not defeat. Not despair, not condemnation, but hope and joy. And all because He loved us with amazing love.

Overcoming Inferiority

Aside from salvation, the biggest miracle God has done in me has been to help me overcome strong feelings of inferiority. For many years, I had a hard time shaking off feeling not good enough at anything. I felt unneeded and worthless. I disliked my personality and started to be envious of those with the personality I wanted. I knew I didn’t like myself. I knew I had days of deep discouragement that stemmed from these feelings. But I didn’t know how to get beyond these cycles.

And then God came and through His grace the backbone of my nemesis was broken. God kindly revealed my root issues weren’t “inferiority” or “low self-esteem” at all. The root of my issues was pride -wounded pride- that fed these feelings. Envy and jealousy ate away at me and led me to feel inferior to others.

As awful as the diagnosis was (pride, envy, jealousy), I was grateful to finally realize what I was dealing with. For years I hadn’t found a way of getting beyond the heaviness and sadness that came when I was reminded how secondary I was. But when the root causes were finally revealed, I recognized God’s power to both forgive me and help me overcome the sins my dark discouragement was rooted in. In exchange for the old thought patterns, I had to learn to focus on who I am in Christ.

By God’s grace, my thought processes have changed and I have experienced victories I never dreamed was possible. Yet I’m like an addict who kicked his habit but will forever be susceptible to the old life unless deliberate steps are taken to stay away from it. I know I could fall back into old thought patterns and feelings if I didn’t recognize them and reject them when they first come to tempt me. In fact, lately I’ve been fighting off a lot of these feelings and decided that now is the time to implement a month of focusing on victory.

Since God “fashions our hearts alike” (Psalm 33:15), I thought some of you might like to join me in this exercise.   

DAY ONE:

   The battle is either won or lost in our mind. One of our strongest weapons against being debilitated by feelings of inferiority is to catch negative thoughts when they first tempt us, reject those that are not God-honoring, and choose to refuse to let them take over our mind.

   If a random thought has the potential to drag us towards more negative thought patterns, let’s reject it before it has the chance to lay its mantle of heaviness across our shoulders. Catching thoughts early diffuses their power before they can control us, plus they are much easier to stop when they are in their infancy than after they have beaten us down for a few days.

    I used to wonder if thoughts or feelings came to me first. Sometimes I felt a spirit of heaviness and when I tried to figure out what caused it, I could come up with a zillion reasons why I should feel that way. I wasn’t as talented, as good, as popular. . .and there I went down the spiral of discouragement. So whether it is a thought or merely a feeling of heaviness, don’t let it have its way today.

Action for today: Deliberately and diligently guard your thought life. Purpose to reject thoughts that do not pass the Philippians 4:8 test. According to this verse, we should think about things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report, full of virtue and praise. Anything else must be rejected. (And a side note for the crafty among us: Our thoughts need to pass each category listed there, so what you think about yourself can’t just be perceived truth; it also needs to praise God and be of a lovely report.) 

Life Lesson from Algebra

"What you do to the one side must be done to the other." (Algebra 101. No partiality there.)

"What you do for the one child must be done for the other." (Parenting 101. No partiality there, either.)

Sophia has wanted a little cardboard vehicle ever since Tyler and I made a truck together. It wasn't until we had started the project that I realized the biggest pull for her wasn't to own a car but the chance to paint something. She did a fine job on the little car with its pipe cleaner axles and old flip-flop tires and is very pleased with the results.

The original boxcar.