My heart is full.

I blame it on the time of year.

I celebrate a birthday, Thanksgiving, a wedding anniversary, and Christmas 

all within two months time.  It is just too much.  

Too much happiness.  

     Too much love.  

                                         Too much of everything good.

So because we're still in that season, 

my heart is full.

I suppose as I age I'll be in great danger of my heart exploding

 into a zillion happy pieces during this time of year.  

As it is I think it comes pretty close.

I was given piles of birthday presents.

Ten, I think.

I didn't even know there were ten people

who would not only remember my birthday, 

but who would want to give me a present.

But there were.

And then there was Thanksgiving with its

turkey, dressing, and all the traditional aromas that go along with it:

Sage. Pumpkin. Spice.

Thanks.  Family time.

Sitting at a little table for two of a charming coffee shop,

sipping seasonal lattes,

talking and laughing,

dreaming...

"Happy Anniversary," he told me, grinning.  

We toasted with our cardboard and paper cups full of Chai.

"Here's to many more wonderful years."

We chose the Loft at the cabin where we were gifted two nights.

It was my zany idea to skip the luxurious Master Bedroom with its perks 

and to opt for the Loft with the Skylight,

but he seconded the suggestion immediately.

Stars would have twinkled through the Skylight

had they not been hidden somewhere behind the clouds.

Instead, rain danced on the skylight, our little Window to Heaven.

It played there for most of our two days and two nights

but we thought that it only

added to the charm of the dream-like Loft.

Rain also danced on the cabana roof 

where steam most likely was boiling out of the slat at the top.  

We reveled in the Hot Tub Room with all that 

curling steam and deliciously hot water.

Hours to soak up the luxury.

The children loved it.

Yes, the children.

I know.  I said I have some zany ideas.

But the children sleep so much and so well.

We could divide our days into fourteen hours of anniversary dating

and ten hours of family vacation.

The cabin was huge.  

The children slept on a different floor than we did.

We wouldn't even know they were there

unless they were hungry.

Which they were at seven every morning.

And at two in the afternoon when we thought they'd be napping.

Okay, so our days weren't the 14:10 ratio we expected.

But family vacation is worth something, too.

Our days were too soon gone

and too full of love.

So my heart hurts today.

It aches because John had to go back to work
and I to normal life

and the children needed a mother

not a starry-eyed dreamer

who is living off of coffee and sweet memories.

But Christmas is coming and I can't see my heart getting better anytime soon.

Because it melts into a puddle over seasonal sweet things

like volunteers who ring bells in the frigid cold

all to give gifts to the poor

and the college that forfeited its rightful income earned by parking violations

and had the violators pay in canned goods instead

so they could give to the poor.

Christmas. 
A time of giving and cheer,
Celebration and joy
and gratitude and loving
and peace and happiness.
All because of Christ.

As I said, my heart is full.

Maybe it is the season.
And I love it.